My wife, Dawn Wesley, is abnormal. Well, maybe that’s not the right word. Special? Gifted? That might be closer. Dawn has this strange ability to know exactly how many stairs there are in every place we’ve ever lived. Not approximately, not “about ten” or “around fifteen,” but exactly. She knows how many steps lead up […]
When I was growing up, a vacation usually meant one thing: family. We did not take many trips in the modern sense. We were not loading up the car to go to resorts or booking rooms months in advance. If we were going somewhere, it was usually to see grandparents, uncles, aunts, and cousins. Family
I was almost thirteen years old in the summer of 1976 when my father took me to a large religious rally in Phoenix, Arizona. It was America’s Bicentennial, and everything seemed wrapped in red, white, and blue. Patriotism and faith were woven together so tightly in those days that it was hard to tell where
The God We Wanted: A Reflection at America’s 250th Read More »
Today, counseling is often marketed as though almost anyone can become an effective therapist with enough coursework, enough supervision hours, and enough credentials behind their name. Training matters, of course. Ethics and skills matter. But I am not convinced that training alone creates the kind of counselor people seek when their lives are falling apart.
The Making of a Counselor Read More »
We have deer everywhere. Every morning and evening, Dawn and I can sit on the front porch with our Coke Zero and watch them moving through the woods. We catch them on our cameras at all hours, grazing, wandering, sometimes standing still as if posing for us. They’re beautiful creatures, and I enjoy seeing them.
Deer and Great Grandma’s Chickens Read More »
When I was younger, I often found myself wishing I could fast-forward time. Sometimes it was because I was looking ahead to something I was excited about, a trip, time with friends, graduation, or some new season of life that felt just out of reach. Other times, it was because I wanted to get through
When I was nineteen years old, I lived in a small trailer in Phoenix, Arizona with my brother. We were both trying to build a life after leaving our parents’ home. He worked at Circle K, and I attended Bible school during the day while working nights as a mobile armed guard. We didn’t have
What I Learned Guarding Barry Goldwater Read More »
One of my first introductions to what would later become modern social justice training happened years ago while I was working as a Child Protective Services investigator in Arizona. At the time, I was also working toward becoming a therapist, and I believed strongly in treating people equally. I believed investigations should rise or fall
When Equality Became Equity (The Same Pants, Part 2) Read More »
My dad taught me something simple that has stayed with me my entire life. He used to say, “Everyone puts their pants on the same way, one leg at a time.” To some people, that may sound like just an old country saying, but to my father, it was a philosophy of life. My dad
The Same Pants (Part 1) Read More »
As some of you know, I often write about lessons I learned from my parents, grandparents, mentors, clients, students, and friends. (See the latest – https://wesleyphd.com/sometimes-gifts-come-back-to-us/) I have been incredibly blessed with wise people in my life, and I am deeply grateful for them. But lately I have been thinking about something else. That equation
The Other Side of Wisdom Read More »