My great-grandfather, William Washington Elmore, was a handsome man, except for his left eye, which had been blinded when he was young. (See the photo attached. He is the young man in the front row.) In 1908, at age twenty-six, he married my great-grandmother, Diana Vincent. She was only sixteen. They were country folk, living […]
William Elmore and Brownie Read More »
This morning we lost power. We still do not have power and are getting a little colder. We’ll be fine. That’s not the point of this story. Like many people do during storms, someone posted in a community group asking if others had lost electricity. Several folks chimed in: yes, they were out too. Others
When the Power Goes Out: Gratitude Without Superiority Read More »
When a child starts to struggle at school, at home, or in relationships, most parents do what good parents do: they seek help. They call the school counselor, ask friends for referrals, or look for someone online who “specializes in kids like mine.” The problem is, in today’s world, that often means walking into a
Pt. 3 – Seeing Beyond the Label: What Parents Should Look for in a Therapist Read More »
Over the years, I’ve noticed that when I speak about the diagnosis and overdiagnosis of children, or the growing tendency to label every challenge as a mental health disorder, some people assume I’m speaking from a place of privilege or outdated thinking. I understand why. I don’t fit the profile of what many would call
Pt 1 – When Labels Become Identities: What decades of experience have taught me. Read More »
We’ve become a culture of shortcuts. Quick dopamine hits instead of slow growth. Virtual affection instead of human touch. Excuses instead of effort. And while some substitutes come from heartbreak or loss and deserve compassion, others are chosen out of fear, laziness, or comfort. Let me start with empathy. Not everyone has access to what
Stop Accepting Substitutes Read More »
There’s a certain kind of phrase that rolls off the tongue easily when we don’t know what to say. “Everything happens for a reason.” “God has a plan.” “This must be part of something bigger.” They’re meant to soothe, but too often, they wound. I’ve sat with people who lost a child, who were betrayed
The Cruelty of Comforting Lies Read More »
In counseling, we often lean on the ACEs framework, Adverse Childhood Experiences, as a way to understand the lasting impact of abuse, neglect, and family dysfunction. It’s a useful lens, but it has a blind spot. Not every hard or painful experience a child goes through is trauma. Some adversities, though they sting in the
When Hardship Isn’t Trauma: The Difference Between ACEs and Growth Experiences Read More »